Do you like who you are? Are you happy with your life? Are there things you want to try but have doubts as to whether you can do them? Do you believe that you are a blessing to the world?
I get it. I was not happy with myself or my life and for a long time, I really thought that someone like me could never do what I’m doing now because I was broken.
I see so many people who have given up and think that they too, are defective and broken and it’s so sad to see that because I know how that feels. It feels like hopelessness. Have you ever felt hopeless? It makes you feel empty and dark. It makes you think that nothing good is ever going to come your way. It makes you want to give up.
I would always see all these sucessful people who seemed to just be so positive and strong and I would think that they were born that way or just lucky or blessed. Not every one can be like that, right? Their lives are just great from birth to death?
I’ve since learned that no one is perfect and even though it seems that they just sail through life getting all the lucky breaks, the best jobs, always seeming to be happy no matter what, that is an illusion. We all have problems. We’ve all had things happen to us and everyone goes through periods of self doubt and low self-esteem.
The fact is..the people we think are perfectly happy and have all the luck are the ones who have fallen down and pulled themselves back up and taken the action to go further, to never give up, to sacrifice in order to become the person they need to be in order to have the life they want. They work their asses off, they are exhausted, they fail, they lose everything but still get back up and they fight their way back to the top.
I want to do that. I am well on my way. I took a long, reflective, look at myself and decided that I was tired of my own crap. Yes, I had bad things happen, I went through a lot as a child. I’ve been hurt, I’ve been picked on and bullied and I have believed all the lies that other people have told me and the ones I’ve told myself. But when you get tired enough of the way your life is, you’ll either lay down and quit or you’ll get up and do something!
Are you doing something to change your life? Do you want to? I do and I am. I’m working so hard to just be myself, unashamedly, authentically, and genuinely. When I started this, everyone thought that I was just going through a phase and they were supportive..until I went even further than I ever have and I stood up and told them that this is who I am and this is what I expect. I have boundaries now and I expect for them to be respected. I don’t get upset at everything that comes my way and I don’t fear everything anymore.
Oh I have fears… I just choose to ignore them and do it anyway. I’m running as fast as I can towards that life that I know I can have. I’m focused so hard on that life, that I can only see the successful outcome that I’m working towards.
I took what I love doing and I’m putting it out there in hopes that I can help someone. I’m not thinking about how many followers I’m going to get. I’m not thinking about whether people like me or not. I’m not looking to write my blog the same way everyone else does and I’m not writing everything that all the other people are writing.
I’m putting my feelings and my thoughts on here the same way as if I were telling you in person. I have so much drive to get up everyday and reach out to whoever needs a friend to help them see the blessing that they are!
I haven’t mastered everything that I need to, but that’s ok. I am a work in progress and I’ll always be a work in progress because I will always strive to be better than the day before. I’m not afraid of failing, I consider failure to be a lesson that I can only learn from. When you take fear and doubts out of your head and replace it with confidence and belief in yourself, you are limitless in what you can achieve.
There will come a time when you look back at all the hardships you’ve been though and they’ll seem like someone else’s hurts. It won’t hurt anymore and when that happens, you will be so fulfilled and whole, that nothing will ever stop you from doing what you know you were made for.
I had this moment a few weeks ago when I was in a zoom meeting with my group and I was telling someone else that her day would come. I realized after I said that IT DIDN’T HURT ANYMORE, that I had a breakthrough in myself. I can look back on the ugly stuff and it doesn’t hurt me the way that is has before. I’ll never forget it, but I know now that none of what was done to me or said to me, had anything to do with me. I have grown and evolved and I no longer feel ashamed or guilty…I feel free and genuinely at peace. That is the best feeling in the world and I want everyone to feel that way.
When that day comes for you, you’ll know everything is going to be ok and all your pain and fears will go away and it will be replaced with peace, confidence, and a belief in yourself that will bring you and your story to a place of pure joy. The kind of joy that makes you jump out of bed every morning and gives you the courage to change the world!
People tell me all the time that I can’t change the whole world and maybe I can’t but I can change the world around me and that causes the ripple effect. That ripple can go as far as you can imagine because each person you touch in a positive way will send out that same ripple.
I truly believe that if we start the changes and self improvements in ourselves first, it’s easier to improve other relationships. Changing your perspective, or mindset, is the first place to begin for that.
I started really looking at my way of thinking and I had a horrible mindset. It was full of doubt and negativity, I told myself that I had no value to give to anyone. I would just shut down completely because I was just stuck and miserable. I had to get fed up and tired of the life that I was living and I made a decision that would lead me to the most wonderful place I have ever been!
I read everything I could find on mindset and I read it until I knew every single word. I put action to everything that it said to do and within a week, my mind was calmer than it had ever been. I’ve always been laid back and pretty content, but I was content with a miserable existence because I had no idea how to change anything. I didn’t think I could change anything.
The more action that I put into changing my way of thinking, the lighter I felt and then one day I was talking to a friend and giving her a pep talk and trying to build her up and I went through a whole speech and when I was done, she just looked at me and smiled. I was looking at her curious to know why she was cheezing it so big and all she said was, “There she is”. I had no idea what she meant and then she told me that I was lost in that speech because she could feel the emotions coming from me and it made her want to go out and do something magnificent!!
What? I was stunned and told her she was crazy, but the more I wrote in my journal and online, the more people would say the same thing and I still have a hard time accepting all the compliments, but really? Me? Inspiring? I still have work to do. I am and will always be a work in progress, but I will tell you now that you must believe in yourself, wholeheartedly and completely or you’ll never change your perspective.
Once you’ve mastered your mindset, you’ll have the tools to go even further in your personal growth. What do you want to do? Who do you want to become? What have you dreamed of that you thought you would never be able to accomplish? Take that newfound mindset and find your purpose. Find that thing that makes your heart smile when you think about it. Find out what makes you excited to get up everyday and go out into the world.
Never let anyone dictate who you are and what you can do! Those are their limitations. You are in charge of your thoughts and feelings and it is up to you to find your purpose and to take that journey. Only you can walk that walk. They can walk with you, but they can’t do it for you.
Adding meditation to your daily routine and a gratitude journal will help you focus more on the positive and to reset and relax your mind. We all have gifts and we all have a purpose. Look at what brings you joy and start with that. Leave the doubters and naysayers behind and just focus on you and what you are trying to achieve and you’ll find your way to what makes you happy and whole.
Remember that you are the one in charge of your thoughts and feelings. You are the one who will go on to fulfill your purpose and live the life that you choose, so leave the other’s thought’s, words, and doubts behind. All that matters is what you think of yourself and what dreams and goals you are running to. Go out and make it all happen! You can do it! I have all the faith in the world in you and you should too!! Do you believe that you are a blessing to this world? Do you have the courage to be a blessing?
Having the courage to do scary things at times feels as though we are jumping out of an airplane. You heart flip flops, you’re breathing faster, maybe your palms are sweaty? That’ OK. Those are normal reactions to fear. Being courageous is not something you feel, although you can, but it’s a decision to do something afraid. I’ve been there a million times and I still get scared, but I remember that my story and my gifts are meant to be used to help others and that is more important than my fears. Have faith sweetness…you were born to be a blessing. We all were. So take a deep breath, let it go, and take that courage inside of you and change the world around you! I believe in you and so should you!